Cashmere mafia

The body series

Junia Sebego (21)

” Why do we always need to compare one another so we can grow” – Junia

Social media can be very intimidating, from the women’s perspective we’re bombarded with pictures on Instagram of women who post “#ootd’s” and “#fashionfridays”, and it often leaves me with the perception that in order to proof that you’re socially progressive, fashionable and economically liberated you need to maintain a particular trend or rather caliber of pictures on your Instagram page.

I was curious to find out Junia’s opinion about this fascination we have on material beauty, of course there is absolutely nothing wrong with dressing up and looking good, however why do we feel the need to almost proof to people that we look as good as we say we do.  Nonetheless my conversation with Junia took a different turn, as to discussing what is socially appropriate for women to wear in public.

“It’s ok if I want to wear a suit to work, than wear something sexy to the club later, just because I’m a lawyer I shouldn’t be given labels on how I’m supposed to dress”, she further explains how normal it is for people to label you as easy because of a perception your clothing may give.

I asked what her thoughts were on the “free the nipple” initiative, encouraging women to walk freely with our nipples showing to erase sexist perceptions men may have when they see a half naked women. “We need to stop comparing ourselves to men, men and women are different , why do we always need to compare ourselves to them so we can grow”.

So it seems that we are we stuck in a tug of war between trying to find comfort in who we choose to be, irrespective of what society thinks were supposed to look like and the distance that we are slowly building by saying “I don’t need anyone’s approval to tell me I’m fabulous” and posting consecutive #ootd’s on Instagram. I think we are all guilty of a bit of vanity, however to what cost? I sometimes imagine the response my daughter will give me when I tell her  to believe me when I tell her  she’s beautiful, “Kodwa Ma, did you believe it when you heard it?” In essence Junia believes we that being true to what makes you comfortable is true beauty, whoever is watching will learn about what confidence means.

May love, grace and peace be with you.



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